More Magazine (18 January 2010)

When I went down to see Duncan James and Sheridan Smith at the Savoy Theatre in London, I wasn't expecting the warm welcome I got. Sheridan made us all a cuppa in her dressing room (I spotted her trying to hide her chicken fillets!) and Duncan turned up late - what a diva! (Not really - he even invited me round to his house to nick some of his cast-off clothes). Yes, next time you see me on the telly I could be dressed as Duncan from Blue...

Alan: Hello there you two! How is the show going?
Duncan: It's going great actually. We're having really good fun aren't we?
Sheridan: Yeah, it's brilliant.
D: I like working with Sheridan. She makes it for me.
A: Aww!
D: I am glad you're in the cast, Sheridan, because we get on great and I'm closest to you out of anyone in the whole bloody cast.
A:[To Sheridan] Do you like him?
S: No. [Laughs] I absolutely love him, I do. I'm really chuffed. I did worry. You worry about your leading man. If you're going to get on with him...
A: Yeah. But there's chemistry between you, isn't there?
D: [Laughs] We have to kiss each other every night.
S: He's a really good kisser.
A: Is he?
S: Really good kisser.
D: We slip the tongue in sometimes.
S: We do, we do slip the tongue in.
A: Do you slip the tongue in on special nights, like, maybe on a Saturday night? 'It's the weekend, let's have a bit of tongue'?
D: Sometimes we like to slip in a bit of garlic breath as well, just to put the other person off.
S: [Laughing] Yeah, we went out to dinner the other day...
D: We both had some garlic bread - we were both stinking! I made her eat it, I said, 'If I'm going to have some garlic bread, you have to have some too. Otherwise I'm going to kiss you and you're goign to pass out with the stink of garlic. 'She was like, 'I don't really want any', and I was like, 'You're going to fucking have some!'
S: When are you going to come and see Legally Blonde, Alan?
A: I am coming this month, actually. So, have you had any wardrobe problems? You have loads of costume changes. Have you done a Janet Jackson? Has your tit popped out, Sheridan?
S: I split my pants in rehearsals, didn't I?
D: You did.
A: No!
S: There I was, with my arse hanging out.
A: What do you wear? Thongs, big knickers?
S: It was a French knicker that day, Alan.
A: Ooh, nice. Does your knob pop out sometimes, Duncan? Here at more! we like to know these things...
D: No, no cock falling out, thank God. We do have a little grope, though, at the beginning of the show.
S: You do grope me a lot.
D: I do.
A: He's a good kisser, is he a good groper?
S: He's a good groper as well.
A: Duncan, your character's quite naughty, isn't he?
D: He is a bit of a c***. To put it mildly...
A: A loveable rogue, would you say?
D: He's a bit of a knob to be honest. He dumps Sheridan's character Elle because his mum and dad have told him he's got to have a serious girlfriend as he is going to Harvard Law School. And of course, Sheridan follows my character, Warner, to Harvard and she discovers he's got another girlfriend. A brunette...
S: [In American accent] With a mousy brown bob!
D: And of course that breaks Elle's heart, so then she tries to win me back and I become more and more of a knob throughout the show really.
A: Do you enjoy playing those parts? Do you enjoy playing a bastard?
D: Yes, it's quite fun.
A: It must be fun playing a baddie...
D: It's a bit pantomimey. I do a scene where I propose to the other girl in front of Sheridan and the audience go, 'boo'!
A: Sheridan, are you a dumb blonde? What's the dumbest thing you've done?
S: All the time, yeah. All sorts. I burnt my bruschetta the other day, set the kitchen on fire. Do you think I am intelligent?
A: [Laughs] Well, I wouldn't go that far.
D: You're not a ditsy blonde, not at all.
S: I'm not bright though.
A: So Duncan, have you had any of the boys from Blue come down to see you?
D: Yes, on the first night.
A: First night? Great. Has your Gavin and Stacey co-star James Corden come to see you, Sheridan?
S: He said he'd wait until I settle in.
A: Oh, that's nice...
S: He's not goign to tell me when he is coming, which is quite scary. But I'll hear his laugh - you know what his laugh is like. I'll know after the first five minutes.
A: Did you see that picture of me and him at Mariah Carey's party, with my tit hanging out?
S: It was brilliant!
D: Your tit hanging out?
A: I was so pissed. Mariah had these £1,000 bottles of Champagne at her party. I'm so pikey! I was like, 'I'll have a bit of that, it's free.' Then I was on the podium, dancing. James rips open my shirt and starts licking my nipple and then flash, flash, flash - the paparazzi are there! Anyway, enough about me, did you make a New Year's resolution?
D: My New Year's resolution was to sort out my house, Kelly Hoppen [interior designer] is coming round to sort it out.
S: Is she?!
D: My walk-in wardrobe is just ridiculous. It's overflowing. So I am just going to get rid of this stuff I don't need. Clear out.
A: You need to sort it out.
D: Do you want any clothes?
A: Yeah, I could come round and have first pickings. Don't throw them out. Actually, I couldn't fit in your clothes.
D: Why not?
A: What size waist are you?
D: 34.
A: Well I'm a 34! On a good day. When I take my maternity panel out. And what was yours, Sheridan?
S: Just keep on not smoking.
A: Well done! How long have you been off the cigarettes?
S: Eight weeks.
A: God, that's brave.
S: I stopped as soon as I found out I was doing Legally Blonde.
D: You've been brilliant though.
S: Yeah, because I've been so busy with this, I've not had a chance to think about it. It's when I have a drink that I fancy one.
A: That's always the way.
S: But I'm doing alright, so I'm going to try and keep it up. That's the plan for the rest of the year.
A: Well, congratulations on stopping smoking! Listen, it was lovely to meet you both - Duncan I'll pop round for a cup of tea and look through your clothes soon then?
D: Anytime, Alan!