And measuring around 5ft-high each, they could be straight out of Bruce Forsyth's classic ITV game show Play Your Cards Right.
So it's somehow fitting that our photographer shouts 'higher' or 'lower', like Brucie's contestants did, as he gets Alan, Sheridan and us to juggle the cards into a perfect position for our exclusive pictures.
When Alan's quirky character, Jonathan, isn't solving baffling murder-mysteries, he's inventing magic tricks for flamboyant but clueless illusionist Adam Klaus (played by Stuart Millington).
It was no great surprise, therefore, when we found the giant cards among a wonderful collection of props (including Moroccan lanterns, caskets and statues) that the Creek team is using to transform an empty room inside the town hall into a set where Jonathan and Adam rehearse.
Today's scenes are for a new 95-minute special for the BBC1 crime drama. "This is at the start,' explains Alan. 'The first time you see Creek, he's wheeling in Adam's head on a silver platter!'
The episode, The Judas Tree, took four weeks to film. It reunites Jonathan with hsi cynical sidekick Joey Ross (Sheridan). The pair first teamed up for the 2009 New Year Special, The Grinning Man.
This time, Joey asks for help after sinister events befall a young woman. The pair are soon unravelling the link between a present-day and a Victorian mystery. There's also an hilarious sub-plot that sees Joey become Adam's new assistant!
Here, Alan, 44, and Sheridan, 28, give us a few more clues...
So, what more can you tell us about the plot of The Judas Tree?
Alan: It's difficult to tell you too much, but I can reveal that Jonathan gets it wrong!
Does Joey get it right?!
Alan: You'll have to wait and see! There are a couple of unusual things in this one because there are so many murders he's helping to solve. It's also the first time viewers will see Jonathan in court, giving evidence.
Jonathan's definitely met his match in Joey. Is romance in the air?
Alan: With the two of them bickering all day long, it's more like the relationship with Maddy Magellan [played by Caroline Quentin in the first three series]. And for viewers it'd be a stretch of credibility given that Sheridan's about 40 years younger than me!
Sheridan: Jonathan's like a big brother to Joey. She likes Creek but also enjoys iwnding him up and making out she's superior. They get on better in this episode but still irritate the hell out of each other!
Considering Jonathan Creek had been off screen for five years, how did you feel when The Grinning Man attracted 9.9 milllion viewers?
Alan: We were thrilled! When I saw the Top 10 programmes for New Year week and we were above EastEnders, I thought, "Now that's good going!". I'm on Twitter and every single day I get asked if there will be more Creeks.
Sheridan: I'm honoured to be back because I thought they'd have a new sidekick for this special.
Jonathan's not a typical hero. What is it about him that people love?
Alan: I think it's more that people like a good story, that's the real appeal. If you don't watch till the end you're going to be up all night wondering what happened! Creek writer David Renwick is a master storyteller.
If David wrote more episodes, would you be happy to continue playing Jonathan?
Alan: Sure. But this is the 27th mystery that David's come up with and it's not going to be a bottomless well. I don't know if he'll do more, but I always say: If you think of one, I'll get my duffel coat out!
Has working on Jonathan Creek turned you into sceptics?
Alan: I'm totally sceptical! I can't watch Derek Acorah doing Most Haunted. I sit there going "Whatever!" A crew member on one of those type of shows told me a story about a girl who went to bed with a teddy bear and dreamt the bear had gone next door.
When she woke, the bear was indeed in the next room. He asked me how they did it and I replied that there were two bears, obviously. One had been planted next door and the one in the bed had been hidden. He looked so disappointed and I said, "I'm sorry but that's 12 years of Jonathan Creek for you!".
How about you, Sheridan?
Sheridan: Weirdly enough, the other night I watched one of the old episodes of Jonathan Creek on my own and the whole house started banging, rattling and shaking! I'm normally very Joey about it all but I was so scared; my dogs were going mental. It turned out to be a tap - the pressure in the pipes was wrong and I had to get a plumber. But at the time I thought, I'm going to have to get Alan round here to help me work out what's happening!
Alan: And I'd have turned up and said, "That'll be the heating!"
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